As Predicted…

25th August 2020. 9:35pm.

I’ve gone to bed early. I have a big mug of tea, Minstrels, MnM’s, White Sage and Nag Champa incense burning and listening to one of my Princelings playlists. Some say if someone shares their music with you, sometimes it’s a window into their soul. I believe this to be true. I think I learned something tonight.

I’m actually running low on incense for the first time in months. Crazy. I thought to myself when I decided to start smoking outside ‘I guess next time I decorate It will stay fresh.’ I wonder how much residue the incense leaves everywhere? Oh well, at least it will smell nice.

Chilling with smooth jazzy tunes. Tomorrow will be interesting. Once we are done with college enrolment, my Princeling is going with his friends for theirs. I’ll have most of the day to myself. Previously this would almost be an exiting prospect. Not so much these days.

I’m looking at the photos of My Lady I have put on our chest of drawers with candles and incense burning as usual. While I’m not currently in much pain, I’m just sat here still confused by the whole thing, shaking my head while sucking brown MnM’s one at a time until they are completely melted before popping another. Our bedroom is still mostly untouched. The last six months feel like a few seconds when I look around. Apart from the photos, It’s still pretty much how she left it. I’m still in no rush. What need is there to change it anyway? I like how we have it, after all it is my bedroom too. I mean… What’s wrong with pink and purple luminous Unicorn stickers around the mirror? I can go with that… Well, I wear My Lady’s perfume every day so why the hell not?!

I purchased a “Black lives matter” face mask the other day. It’s fascinating watching the different reactions to it. I’ve had dirty looks, mostly from meatheads and even a few thank you’s. No one has been brave enough to say anything negative so far. I did say this would be a random read didn’t I? The more tired I get, the more random my thoughts become. I find it interesting reading it back after a while with a little objectivity. One thing is immediately obvious… I am indeed… Bat shit crazy. Thoughts pinging off all over the place, making random connections with seemingly irrelevant topics. I am writing them pretty much as I think them. What’s the point otherwise? It’s weird seeing your thinking voice written down.

One or two people have read some of this drivel now… Not sure how I feel about that.

I’m still trying to process this whole opening of my mind to what I can do for a job. It’s like it happened all at once. Time for another lesson in surfing…

Night x